A Doctor a day makes Eli not want to play!

I had my 18 month checkup today. You guessed it! I have hepatitis! Just kidding- I got a hepatitis shot though, so I might have hepatitis somewhere, I'll have to ask my Tutu exactly how that works. Since my last checkup 3 months ago, I have gained 2 ounces and 2 inches! Hooray for growing! I am 2'9" and weigh 23.5 pounds. The turkey my Mom bought for Thanksgiving was bigger than I am! Good grief!

Maybe I am willing myself to grow tall instead of round, so I can reach my Dad's miter saw... I'll bet that's it.

Here is a picture of me today, in all my skinny glory



That is my Christmas tree that is in my house. When Mom first said we were going to put a tree in the living room, I thought she was kidding, but apparently that is what they do in whacked out places like Moreland Idaho. Crazy redneck traditions! Next thing you know we'll hang our socks over the fireplace and stuff them with candy. Hey, that's actually a pretty creative idea, I think I'll suggest it to my Mom.

Hey Mom!?!

E Out

Thanksgiving Ridiculousness

A bunch of my Aunties and Uncles were here for Thanksgiving this past week, and the silliness was palpable. To begin with, my Auntie Kim decided that I would look cute with my hair styled in a girlish fashion. I was bribed in compliance with the promise of peanut butter creme pie, and here is the end result



As soon as my dad saw this, he pulled the elastic out and handed me a screwdriver, so as to prove that I am really actually quite masculine.

Later in the week, my Auntie Bonnie (in the above picture with my Auntie Kim) decided I would look cute with eye shadow on. Fortunatly, no pictures of this event have survived. When dad saw that, he immediately dressed me up as a lumberjack. I didn't even have to be bribed with pie for this event; Auntie Bonnie is so cute, I might have to beat up Uncle Todd so I can date her. Of course, there is the 22 year age difference... Also the fact that she's taller than me, and I don't like to date tall women. Also the fact remains that Uncle Todd can kick my butt... All well, I guess he can keep her...

E Out

Duck, Duck, Duck, ELI!

My Mom and Dad took me to the park last week, and I fed the ducks and the geese!

Here is me feeding a goose. Silly goose!



Here is me teasing a goose. She wanted the bread I had, but I psyched her out!



Here is me feeding the ducks and geese from the top of a picnic table because the they got mad at me for teasing them, and tried to eat my fingers.



I don't know about you, but I did NOT see that one coming... fortunately my mom has a mean right hook. I guess birdies have a poopie sense of humor. Who knew?

E Out

Cousins And Other Such Nonsense

I have two cousins.

One is a boy. His name is Dillon, and he is fun to play with. We both like trucks and mud, and since he is bigger than me, he can reach stuff I want off the counters. We're good buddies. Here is a picture of me and him.



See how cool he is? Even though he's bigger, he still let me drive! What a guy!

I also have a girl cousin. Her name is Breanna. She wears a lot of pink. Her room has butterflies in it. Weird... Here is a picture of her and me.



As you can see, I was afraid of getting cootie-itis, but Mom explained to me that there is no such thing, and we get along fine now.

Here is a picture of all of us cousins with my Uncle Scott.



We are awesome huh?

Now the reason I am posting about my cousins, is that both of them are getting new babies at their house in the spring, and I think it is high time I got one, too. Just think, Mom and Dad - if I have a baby brother, I will be able to teach him how to spit, and all about trucks! If I have a baby sister... uh... I'm not really sure what that would be like, but I'll bet it wouldn't be BAD... After all, can there possibly be a downside to having more than one baby like me? ...




Really!

E Out

Home Improvement, Eli Style

My Dad and Mom bought a new house, and have since been drawing on me for creative ideas for remodeling and slave labor in implementing those ideas. I guess I shouldn't complain too much. At least the time I was forced to paint the dining room,



my dad helped.





It looked pretty good, if I say so myself...




And then there was the "drawer incident". Mom asked me to strip down and refinish the kitchen drawers, but I had had enough!



I goofed off instead, and since then Mom and Dad have stopped making me work on the house. That WAS cool, until Mom started wallpapering the bathroom with postage stamps. It looks so fun! What other time in my life will I have a chance to stick a billion stamps on a wall!? Maybe when I have my own house...

E Out

Grammar Can Be Glamorous, And Words Can Mean A Lot!

I like words. I don't know a lot of words, but the ones I know are pretty awesome, and I like to say them. Here are just a few : shoes, outside, dad, juice, dog, no, uh-oh, whoa! Here is a video I have written and directed of me making some animal sounds. Enjoy!



That was totally awesome, huh?! My mom's acting stinks though, and no amount of passionate directing can help. All well, you can't have your diaper and poop it too... Here is another video of me playing with my 4-wheeler. My mom kind of snuck up on me and I didn't know the camera was on.



That kiss is for you Tutu! I got your post, and I'll come and see you in Hawaii as soon as my momma brings me. I'm not so sure about that flying business, but I have eaten sand before, and there is nothing better!

I have been informed that there are a bunch of people who are somehow related to me coming to our house to eat Turkey in a few weeks. I'm not a fan of turkey, but I do like pie, and if some of my aunties come, I'll bet I can do the doe-eyed thingy I am so good at and convince them to give me extra. Hee-hee...

Well, I must once again say farewell. Mom is mad at me for spilling water on the not-yet-24-hours-old-carpet, so I'd best be acting adorable to get back in her good graces!

E Out.

Bad Heer Day

My mom tells me that my hair is a force to be reckoned with. I have had 6 haircuts in my 18 month life. She has vowed to never cut it again so I can be like that John the Baptist guy. That sounds like a semi-crazy idea, but whatever. It's been like 4 months, and things are starting to get a little out of control mane-wise.

Here is a picture of me after my first haircut.



Pretty bad huh? Yeah- my momma did it herself. I was 4 months old, and not exactly able to make fashion decisions of my own.

Here is my 4th haircut



Also a homemade chop job. I was a little wiser to how silly I looked, and made up for it by getting creative with my head coverings...







Needless to say, it has been very nice to not have to hide my head in shame for the last while, but here is what my hair looks like today




Force to be reckoned with? I don't know about that, but I do look like a tiny, brunette, non-annoying version of Carrot Top, with a penchant for velour sweatsuits. So here is my dilemma: Do I ask my mom to cut my hair, and suffer the shame of having to hide from all other toddlers? -or- do I ask my mom to cut my hair and hide my shame using the collection of colanders I have stolen and hidden under my crib? -or- do I my hair alone, buy a hair straightener and look like Fabio instead of a freak? *sigh* Toddler hood is full of difficult choices. Like the time I had to decide whether to play in the mud or eat it. That is a story for another day, though. It is dinner time!

E Out

Eli starts a blog

My tutu was bugging my momma about not sending enough pictures of my adora-baby self, and so my momma decided to make a page that she can neglect to post pictures to it, instead. My name is Eli. I'm a toddler.

May 18, 2006 7:46 pm

Eli Hunter Heer (yours truly) is born. Mom declines the drugs, and after the experience, vows to have the rest of her children at home in the bathtub. Here are some pictures of me when I was two minutes old. My mouth is not normally that big. Also, my mom is not normally that puffy. My dad is always that manly and handsome though.







That obviously was almost 18 months ago. I am now a big boy, and therefore much less of a baby. I like loud engines, tools, kitty-cats, and my shoes. Shoes is also my favorite word. Say it with me! Shoes, Shoes Shoes!

I recently had time to reflect on my former life as a baby, and it inspired me to compose a song. (To the tune of "It's Not Easy Being Green" by Kermit the Frog)

*ahem*

It's not that easy being a baby




Having to be completely dependent on grownups for everything

And I think it would be nicer, to be a big boy, or a dinosaur, or my dad,



or something totally cool like that.


It's not that easy being a baby



Babies are tiny, and kind of insignificant



And people tend to pass you over



Cause you're 2' 3", and wear a diaper, and you can't even talk!



But I guess a baby's life is pretty easy



And babies don't have any responsibilities



And babies can sleep when they want to,



And they eat real gross smashed up food, like carrots and peas...



If a baby is all there is to be,



It could make you whine and cry,




But why whine and cry, Whiner?

I was a baby, and it's fine. I got over it, and now I'm a big kid, and that's what I'd like to be....





Okay, my mom has thoroughly embarrassed me with the selection of pics. Thanks Mom. I'm going to bed now.

E out.